Gaza Family's 18-Month Nightmare: Son Believed Dead Is Alive in Israeli Prison
Mohammad Mansour
A Palestinian family in Gaza spent 18 months in mourning after believing their son was dead, only to learn he was alive and imprisoned in Israel. The case underscores the plight of thousands of missing Palestinians and the trauma of 'suspended grief.'
For 18 months, the family of Eid Nael Abu Shaar, a Palestinian man in Gaza, believed their eldest son was dead. They scoured Gaza for his body, obtained a death certificate, and set up a mourning tent. But a sudden phone call from a lawyer confirmed he was alive and being held in Israel's Ofer prison.
Eid vanished on December 15, 2024, while seeking work to support his family near the Netzarim Corridor, an area occupied by Israel. His father, Nael Abu Shaar, said the search shattered the family. “I slept at the doors of morgues and hospitals. Every time there was an announcement of an unidentified body, I would run to check day and night,” he said.
Despite contacting the International Committee of the Red Cross (ICRC) and human rights groups, the family found no information. With no detention records, they eventually held a funeral and obtained a death certificate from the Ministry of Health. But Eid's mother, Maha Abu Shaar, never lost hope. “People told me I needed to pray for the absent, but I refused. My heart told me Eid was alive,” she said.
A glimmer of hope emerged when a released prisoner reported meeting someone named Eid Abu Shaar in prison. The story was confirmed by a lawyer, sparking celebrations across Gaza. The Abu Shaar family and neighbors handed out sweets in their modest homes, turning a place of mourning into a celebration of a “miracle.”
This story is a rare good news in a humanitarian catastrophe. Nada Nabil, director of the Palestinian Center for the Missing and the Enforced Disappeared, estimates between 7,000 and 8,000 Palestinians are missing due to the war, with about 1,500 believed to be forcibly disappeared in Israeli prisons. He called Israel's refusal to provide information a “policy of total secrecy” aimed at “amplifying pain and collective punishment.”
The situation leads to a phenomenon psychologists call “suspended grief,” trapping families in a “spiral between hope and despair.” Wives don't know if they are widows or still married, affecting marriage and inheritance. Nabil described a complete failure of international organizations and the fear families have in reporting missing relatives, fearing retaliatory airstrikes or harsher torture.
For the Abu Shaar family, joy is incomplete. “I am happy, but now my heart is even more anxious. Knowing he is alive, I fear what he is suffering in those cells. I will not be completely happy until I hold him in my arms,” Maha said.
